MsBIA Lost 40 Pounds...and Gained a Circle of Friends!

How did I finally lose the weight I said that I was going to lose, after a series of New Year’s Eve resolutions to not only lose the weight, but also get fit?

As with any other true story, there is no single answer … but here’s the tale.

I have to backtrack just a little bit, to Christmas week of 2000. I’ve developed a bit of a tradition of taking myself away to a spa for Christmas week, and that’s what I did at the end of 2000. Before I got on the plane, my weight had been hovering between 174 and 178—closer to 178, for months—an all-time high. The spa is one I’d been to several times before, so I knew that I would have a great time. Anyway …the two things that were different last year from previous years were

As my weight had increased, hiking (especially the downhills) had become increasingly punishing on my knees, as I was hammering them with all the excess weight at every pace. In years past, I pulled on an ace bandage and kept on going; that Christmas, I actually had to take a couple of days OFF from hiking, which was a wake-up call.
I tried one of the more unusual-sounding spa treatments: “therapeutic reposturing massage.” Part of the massage is an in-front-of-the-mirror assessment of your posture. And I finally saw what had become of me … not only because of the excess weight, but also because of a year (plus) of crippling stress. Have you ever been in a yoga class where they tell you to “stand straight, pull your shoulders back, and let your arms hang by your sides”? I WAS standing “straight,” I DID have my shoulders pulled back, and my arms WERE at my sides … except that my hands were hanging there in front of my thighs! The therapist turned me to “profile” … and I saw this terrifying forward slope from my shoulders to the back of my head. I’ve always been proud of an erect, confident carriage … and here I had shrunken in on myself, in part because of the stress, but also in part to hide the weight. The amazing thing is that in about an hour and 10 minutes, this brilliant massage therapist actually straightened me out!

Needless to say, that year’s resolution to “fix” my body was more than just about vanity! It was about reclaiming my physical identity … my willingness to occupy space in the world.

And over three months I lost about 15 pounds, slowly, mostly by making more sensible choices at the table (nothing heroic, let me tell you), and then I hit “the dreaded plateau” … the weight wasn’t moving, and I wasn’t inspired to make any more dramatic changes in my lifestyle.

So what changed? A friend of mine was in an unfortunate cycling accident. He’s always been very active, and fit, and to help him deal with the enforced (relative) inactivity, I proposed that on the days that he would normally run in the morning, I would meet him in the park for a power walk. By doubling the number of days I exercised (even though I wasn’t working especially hard at it), I began to get more fit. These things went hand in hand for several weeks, and then his arm was comfortable enough to try running again, and I (for the first time in my life!) felt like maybe running wouldn’t kill me.

The running was really the catalyst for me.

It accelerated my metabolism sufficiently that, even though I wasn’t doing any better on the food side, I started to lose weight again.
I started to feel strong and sleek and powerful.
I became inspired to really WORK on those alternate days at the gym, instead of just showing up and going through the motions.
I watched my entire body literally change shape.
I became inspired to accelerate my progress by really being thoughtful about my diet, and NOT having the bread and butter before a meal, etc.

Along the way, I discovered Cyberdiet late one week. I spent an entire weekend reading ALL the success stories, and lurking a bit on some of the boards. On Sunday or Monday, I finally introduced myself to the Over 30 board.

Within a day or two came the tragedies of Tuesday, September 11, 2001. (By the way, I live in New York City.) People react to events in different ways. Some reach out, others pull in, others cease to function, yet others become angry. Given the range of reactions of the people that I’m closest too, the role I had to play was immediately clear: my job was to be the rock of Gibraltar … being needy, in any way, was not a choice available to me. Had it not been for the CD Over 30 board, I would literally not have had a place to vent my feelings, or express my helplessness, or even articulate my need to pray for the victims and everyone who loved (loves!) them. The board became MY rock of Gibraltar.

At the same time, the tragedy—and the tales of heroism that came out of it—reinforced an abiding need of mine to be self-sufficient, and competent, and strong enough to take care of myself … and, I hope, help others. Given that most of the rest of my life was at a complete standstill, I channeled this into my fitness program … not to be skinny, or tiny, but to be strong, and able, whether it be lifting my body weight out of wreckage or being able to run for my life.

The vital statistics: I started out at 178 pounds; I now weigh 138. I lift weights three or four times a week. I’ve gone from tight size 12 jeans to “relaxed” 4s. In my bust, waist, and hips alone I’ve lost over 16 inches. Based on the fit of short-sleeved jacked I tried on after reaching my goal, I’ve lost at least 3 inches in each upper arm. Who knows what the total would be if I had been brave enough to measure all those other places (thigh, “tummy,” etc.) back at the beginning of the journey?

I've also run in two marathons. I’m no speed demon, but I improved my time by a full half hour—from 4:45:06 in Cincinnati in May of 2002 to 4:15:45 at Walt Disney World in January of 2003.

Even more exciting to me is that now I truly feel like an athlete. I trained for this event, and I went into it feeling both primed and relaxed. As I ran, I calibrated how I felt, I calculated my splits, and I realized I was in striking distance of a 4:15:00 finish. And I ran hard—I pushed myself (smartly, I like to think): starting strong but not burning out, staying focused as the miles started ticking by, monitoring my pace and my breathing, fueling and hydrating appropriately...and pushing through and really pressing at the end of the race, accelerating when everyone around me was spent.

I started running before I found Cyberdiet, but it never would have occurred to me to think of a marathon as anything but a stunt for the genetically gifted and/or the mentally unbalanced if it hadn’t been for the fact that I witnessed normal, sane people preparing for, performing in, and planning on pursuing more marathons at Over 30. I can’t attribute my success to Over 30 (or Walk Talk, the other discussion groupI frequent), because after all, I’m the one who did the training, managed my nutrition, stayed focused. But without doubt, Over 30 and Walk Talk have enhanced my athleticism: it is tremendously valuable to be part of a warm, caring, supportive community that focuses on the issues of health, weight management, nutrition and fitness—eventually, everyone else in the “real” world gets bored.

But health, weight, exercise aren’t things you achieve once, celebrate with everyone you know, and then put on a shelf like a trophy. They are only meaningfully achieved and maintained in the context of every day, every month, every year—for life.